Doing Chessed for Yourself By Yonatan Halstuch ('25)
At the beginning of this week’s Parashah, Parashat VaYeira, Hashem appears to Avraham Avinu. Surprisingly, the Torah does not describe anything that Hashem said to Avraham and instead immediately turns to the מלאכים who came to Avraham’s tent. The question is, what was God telling Avraham? What was this meeting about?
Rashi comments on this saying that Hashem was just coming to be מבקר חולים, visting the sick, as Avraham was recovering from his Brit Milah. However, it appears that the Torah explicitly goes out of its way to say that HaKadosh Baruch Hu talked to Avraham.
According to the Midrash, Hashem had made it extremely hot outside, but Avraham refused to go inside when Chessed could be done. Thus, Hashem sent the Melachim to be Avraham’s guests. However another question arises, since everybody knew to go to Avraham Avinu, Hashem could have made nice weather and had regular people come to Avraham?!
Rav Aryeh Lebowitz explains that this act of Chessed done by Avraham serves as the paradigm for Gemilut Chassidim and Hachnasat Orchim. The way he rushes to help his guests with so much enthusiasm demonstrates how important it is to do Chessed properly, no matter the circumstances.
The Gemara in Bava Batra explains that Turnusrufus HaRasha asked R’ Akiva the following question: If Hashem really loves poor people, why doesn’t he just give them money? R’ Akiva answers that of course Hashem has the ability to support them, but He makes it our responsibility so that we can be saved from Gehenom. Tzeddakah is an opportunity for us to become better people and ultimately, the acts of kindness that we do help us more than the recipient.
This is precisely why Hashem set up the story of Avraham Avinu like this. Avraham Avinu works hard tending to the needs of the Melachim, but do they need anything? Of course not! But by Avraham helping them, he earns Zechuyot in Shamayim.
As proof, the same Gemara in Bava Batra says that anything Avraham gave to the Melachim without having someone else do it for him, Hashem paid back to his children.
This message of Chessed is followed by the news that Avraham Avinu and Sarah Imeinu will have a child. This is not a coincidence as there is no greater act of Chessed than what a parent does for a child. Even though a child benefits tremendously from this relationship, there is no greater feeling than the Nachat a parent receives from their child.
So what was the conversation between Hashem and Avraham at the beginning of the Parsha?
Rashbam explains that Hashem appeared to Avraham not by speaking, but by sending the Melachim. HaKadosh Baruch Hu gave Avraham a lesson in Chessed and parenting, rather than speaking directly to him.
If we want to be successful Ba’alei Chessed, we must realize how much we gain by doing Chessed. When you do something for someone else, you must think: “Wow, Look how much they are helping me by giving me the opportunity to do Chessed!”. This focus on Chessed is the paradigm of Avraham Avinu, something we should all be Zoche to learn from.